Life Update: I'm Home!

Alright friends, I know I have been a bit MIA for, oh, about the last month or longer. Im so sorry, but to be honest, life caught up with me! I don't have too too much to update everyone on as of yet, but here is what I can tell you...

I have officially arrived home after spending my year in St. Andrews, Scotland. I can truly say that this experience taught me more than I could have ever imagined learning about life in the entirety of my existence. I will write a post about in a time, but first I feel I need to decompress and reflect on the last nine months in depth before really trying to put them into words.
On another note, I had the privilege to finish up my time abroad with a girls week in London for Mother's day as well as another week and a half showing my whole family around London and Scotland, and then we all adventured over to Ireland! I will post a few pictures from our journey soon...but I have to get them from my brother first which will be a fete!

Finally, as I noted the last time I posted, I spent the semester investing in learning Proverbs 31 backwards and forwards to get an idea of what a modern day Proverbs 31 wife might look like, whether it is a realistic aim, and how being this woman effects my own and others lives. Friends, this was an eye opening experience and I learned loads about both myself and the realities of this goal! There is far, far too much to put all in this post of what I learned or to explain it, so in a post shortly following this one I have decided to be brave and post my final conclusive notes I took to end my semester long study. I hope you will give them a look! If you don't have time though, I completely understand and for that reason I will let you in on the biggest thing I took away from my study.
Here it goes: I came to the realization the being a spouse and mother is not something that just happens, it is a God given privilege that I, and my heart, must be ready and prepared for. There is not guarantee that I will be granted this privilege, but maybe if I work hard on being a Proverbs 31 woman the time could come. In addition, having a loving, godly spouse is a gift from the Lord and a successful marriage is a gift from the Lord as it is such a privilege to be entrusted with the duties of living side by side with another sinner, yet still honoring the Lord over self as well as each other. It is also a honor to be granted the opportunity to spread God’s love and mercy through christian examples and parenting.
The above was only my biggest take away, but it comes nowhere close to covering everything I had, and still have, to learn! On that note, I will update you on this topic shortly, but I have to run to see a friend now that I am finally home! Also, if you are reading this and want to catch up please, please, please reach out to me...I am aching to catch up on friends lives which is extremely hard now that everyone has parted ways for summer! 

Homemade

For months, on my year long journey away, I have been examining a question: who am I? What is my identity? I finally figured it out on this Easter Day, 2014 in St. Andrews. 

I am homemade. 

You see most homes that I know of are held together by a structure of comfort and dysfunction, love and passion, obsessions over what your home and its members have or even lack- when listening, in everyday tasks, in understanding the individuals in the home… there is no mold for a “normal” home, each one is crazy in its own right. None the less, a home is a warm and compassionate sanctuary, its where one can be their most organic self, enjoy relaxing solitude, or the easy, unawkward silence of another’s presence. It is a dungeon where one can take guilty pleasure in sulking in the solitude of loneliness. It is a back ally bursting with secrets, thoughts, and words written in the night. With those unspoken and spoken truths it is full of a form of undying faith. It is a place where you cry until one day you finally laugh again, or, better yet, where you laugh until you cry. It is an outdoor sitting, delving into your deepest thoughts where the sun, rain and wind weather your exterior. It is working and reading by the fire smelling expired life become rich smoke, or maybe even resting in front of the fire with family on  a holiday not quite realizing that past life is turning into a vast radiance of color. Overtime, home is influenced by who has tracked in and out, especially if there was a doormat. It becomes one with the places you and the members of the household have gone or didn’t go, the opportunities you each had or, even better, the ones you made. It is a result of the hands that have worked both in it, and on it, as well as the risks taken for those in the home. The character of the household is determined by adventures had, undeserved privileges given, dreams dreamt, but even more the dreams chased. Home is the picture house where you enjoy an easy night of classic films and indulge in foods that comfort the soul. At any given time a home is only as good as the people in it. I hope those people are loyal because I am those people- loved by them, supported by them, challenged by them, hated by them, I have learned from them, and have been built by each one of their crazy exteriors and dysfunctional interiors. I am homemade.